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THE HUNT FOR THE ALGOS…

All of them now, look totally dejected and lost in despair. “I think we made a great mistake by coming to this bloody place. We lost Ali, we lost Irtaza, we lost Aqib and we lost Robin as well…! At the same time in addition, Rafiq lost Buntu, Farhan and Battakh…And what for? Just to end up on such a barren place like this that doesn’t yield the blueprints of algorithms? What do we do now? It’s such an enraging feeling…”says Anum to Danyal…”I now realize the same and I don’t know what fooled me to come for such a dubious and creepy expedition!” replies Danyal.
At last, the unwanted thing, the night approaches and darkness overruns its despondency over the ambitions of the Kalians…After digging and excavating all day long, in the light of the moon and a few powerful torches, the Kalians find themselves a small site to sleep… The place is a small rocky mound surrounded by gigantic coco trees from all sides that do not grow on the mound but do shelter it from its leaves. The tired Kalians think it to be a safe place to spend the night and so they camouflage themselves with the dark brown-cum-blackish land…
At about 4 o’ clock in the morning, Arifa changes her side to sleep on the left arm…With all the day’s hard work showing on her face and numerous freaky things running in her mind and dreams, she somehow gets to open her eyes and she fails to find the girl who was sleeping beside her…At once she sits straight back and endeavors to look around through the twilight of the false morning…After being unable to find her, she screams wild, “Tasmiyah! Where are you? Everybody wake up, Tasmiyah’s gone!”…The Kalians start looking around for their former cabin girl, in the ambient light of the rising sun…As they disembark the mound and come across the other side of the mound, they realize that the Viperox Thongs were too smart to be fooled and that the mound on which they had been resting all night, was in fact a Viperox that camouflaged itself to perfection, fully in line with the ability to deceive human nature! As they moved further to the other side of the Viperox, they get to witness the tail that wasn’t visible from the other view and was making it look like a mound…On examining hard, they find faint Tasmiyah lying under the tail of the sleeping giant…Hassan runs to save her from the deadly vices, but as soon as he tries to pull her out, the Viperox wakes up…It scrambles its tail onto Hassan in a flash and grabs Tasmiyah by its tongue…Once again, the hunters get to face a havoc! Everybody starts to run, in order to save his/her life. Some of the men carry the badly wounded Hassan on their shoulders and everybody apparently seems to have forgotten about Tasmiyah…
The captain leads them to a safe shingle and starts running back to the place of the havoc…”Wait! Where are you going?” says Danyal with a concern…”Tasmiyah’s there…I’m not that cruel enough to leave her dying…” replies slashDOT…”But wait, dammit! It’s impossible now! It’s useless to go for that lethal combat!” says JB…But slashDOT turns deaf ears and runs to the place with the loaded shot gun…”Hang on Tasmay, I’ll aim its eyes…” says slashDOT…Other guys come running in as well…All the Kalians watch, as the captain aims at the beast’s eye and opens fire from his shot gun…The bullet that leaves the captain’s gun, just before striking the Viperox’s eye, pierces through Tasmiyah’s head as Deadenstein shouts in fury, “Slash! You misjudged it! Dammit!”…slashDOT can’t believe what he had just done and the gun drops off his hand…Danyal and Juni take cover, and bleed the Viperox’s eyes till it dies…A few seconds from the time Tasmiyah got shot by the bullet, and she’s found dead with pain and blood…slashDOT looks at the comatose Tasmiyah in blur, as tears cover his eyes and emotions and he cries to his friends, ”Come on guys, curse me…slash”DOG”, the murderer…I was the one who forced you to this nonsense journey…And look what we’ve got in return…Misery, agony, bloodshed and tears…” and he picks the gun up and endeavors to commit suicide but he fails to do so…”You see how big a loser I am? I can’t even kill my own self!!” he adds with a torrent of tears…JB walks up to him and tries to give him some hope and patience…Further, Fari says, ”Come on slash! Pick your self up. Everyone knows you aren’t a murderer and it all happened by mistake. We tried our best. We were here for a positive cause. Doesn’t matter if we couldn’t succeed but that doesn’t mean that you weren’t good to us. I feel proud to be part of such a tough passage and so do the rest. No regrets whatsoever.”
“Unlike Robin and the rest, we think we shouldn’t leave a girl’s corpse lying on the floor. Better dig a grave for Tasmiyah and let her soul rest in peace…” comes a sound from the bunch of girls. “Let’s dig it for her, guys and leave this place, as quickly as possible. There’s no use spending more time here” says Fari…And at the very place where she died, the men start to dig a memorial grave for Tasmiyah…With tears and sighs, they get to dig about 5 metres deep…Just when Oun pushes the shovel to dig deeper, there sounds some wood, a few inches below…He dexterously excavates and finds a wooden chest inside…The Kalians break the old padlock and to there surprise, it holds the Algorithms by Marcus Clarkson! The Kalians can’t believe it! They take out the algorithms and put the chest back…And dig another grave for Tasmiyah, quite far from the one they just dug…In this way, with tearful goodbyes to Tasmiyah and the rest of the dead men, the Kalians quickly escape the island of Borneo from the southern side…The men-on-sails drag the ship from the North Eastern wing to the Southern side of the island…
Just about an hour later, the men of Avanza reach the same island and Rafiq says to his men, “Girls and guys, it’s all yours now…You guys are gonna come back with the algos, under the supervision of Genie, while I‘ll stay here and take care of the ship…”. In this way, the evil Rafiq escapes the hard slog as he has already searched about each and every beast present on the island and that is why he’s not interested in the blood flow part, all he’s looking forward to, is the algos!
The intelligent Amna points them some footprints that certainly look to be of humans, which actually are the footsteps of the Kalians… They all follow these footsteps and reach the recently dug grave and they start to dig it…On digging it deep, they find a chest that says “My Algorithms-Marcus Clarkson.”…At once, Arqam shouts with curiosity, “Look Genie, the chest looks centuries old, but the padlock looks extremely new! Isn’t this fishy?”…”Shut up, you freak! You are always there to talk non sense…” with these words, Genie turns him down and hits hard to split open the padlock…He then picks a paper that says at the top, ”Hell… Just 3 Seconds away…!” and at the bottom of the page, it’s written, “The Kalians wish you a nice time there!!”…Exactly after three seconds, the explosive that was triggered by the opening of the chest, explodes from the bottom of the chest and the big bang scatters away the pieces of their bodies to metres…
This is what the biggest newspapers of the world say, the next day…
“BORNEO WITNESSES THE BIG BANG. Al Qaeda accepts responsibility” -The New York Times
“AL QAEDA’S FANATIC STUNS MALAYSIA WITH A BLAST. DOZENS DEAD. The detainee, Rafiq also seems to be involved in the Bali bombings, says Malaysian Police” -TIMES ONLINE (UK)
“HIGH INTENSITY BOMB ROCKS MALAYSIA. Al Qaeda’s militant and loads of weaponry, taken in custody” -Malaysia Tribune
While, as the Kalians are about to reach the shores of Karachi, this is what slashDOT expresses while looking through the binoculars, “What the heck? There’s a big crowd waiting there…I see lots of news reporters down there…Do you guys see the fireworks in the sky? I don’t know who told them about our successful return from the hunt for the algos? And oh boy! There certainly are a great number of big personalities standing there…I see Imran Khan, Aamir Khan, Mithal, Steven Spielberg, Yash Chopra, Larry King, Cowasjee, Talha Ghouri (CEO Canon) and so many more! What do you make of it, guys?”…”Yes!! Yes!! Yes!! We’re gonna be famous!! In fact, World famous!! Yipeee!!” says Tabish…”Thank God! With this, I’ll get to resume the trafficking of the centrifuge designs of nuclear explosives! Phewww…I was dying to see this moment in my life” says Deadenstein…
”Well, you still didn’t get to the conclusion that how did they all get to know about our successful hunt return! So let me tell you…As soon as we left Borneo, I called DAWN News and the rest of the world news agencies and told them about it!! I’ve already signed tonnes of contracts through my tongue, on the telephone!! You see Steven Spielberg down there? He’s here to present his new film, ”THE HUNT FOR THE ALGOS” and get it signed by all of us, the starring!! And the Indo-Pak version of the same film will be made by Yash Chopra! And I’ll be writing the whole story of our expedition in the form of a comic in DAWN, TIME magazine and The New York Times!! Plus…We’ll all have a special appearance in the Larry King Live, this week…And oh, I forgot to tell you…There’s a grand press conference, awaiting us there!!”
tells Fari to the sailors! In this way, this bunch of hard working individuals becomes the second biggest newsmaker of the millennium, following the World Trade Center collapse on 9/11/2001, in the list of biggest news ever!
*Copyright © FARRUKH UNPLUGGED! 2008-9. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
*Microsoft, Google, Kalsoft, Avanza, FAST, DAWN, Counter Strike, Wolf Blass, Brunswick, National Geographic, The New York Times, TIMES ONLINE, TIME magazine and Larry King Live are the trademarks of their respective owners.
*I thank you all from the core of my heart, especially Osama, Ms.RT, Arqam, Arifa, Xohaib, Tasmiyah, Faizan, Taha, Asim, JB, Hassan, Anum, Danyal, Akif, Lalarukh, Mustafa, Irtaza, Sadaf, Mehwish, Hina Baji, Talha Ghouri and all the Glorious C community members and FASTian folks, for turning it into a success.
I love you all.
-xo Fari.
THE HUNT FOR THE ALGOS…
The next day, when Tasmiyah opens her eyes, she finds herself tightly wound in metallic chains and fetters, in a dark and lonely room. The room seems like a warehouse and when she turns herself around to and forth, she realizes that the stuff is hay. She jumps back a metre as something hits hard on the wall and she gets to sense that she is in the basement of the ship and it was the sea wave, that just hit the wall of the ship…She feels extremely scared…She screams hard but she finds no one responding…After hours and hours of despair and hunger, she sees a dim light coming her way…On looking more through the helplessly curious retina, she finds a girl coming towards her with a candle in one hand…The girl walks up to Tasmiyah, places a bowl filled with porridge in front of her, as if an in-humane creature being invited to eat, and the girl starts to walk back…”Arifa!”, cries Tasmiyah in a desperate ill tone…Arifa stops for a moment and says,
“DON’T EXPECT SOFT CORNERS FROM ANYONE ANYMORE…WE DON’T WANT A REBEL AMONGST US…AND DON’T TRY TO CALL ANYONE NEXT TIME… YOUR SCREAMS ARE NO NOISIER THAN THE ROUGH SEA WAVES… FORGET ABOUT SYMPATHY…YOU’VE SHATTERED OUR TRUST…SO, N O M E R C Y “,
with these words, Arifa leaves the place while Tasmiyah can’t help screaming and calling her name with tears.
While on the ship of Avanza, Ali Riyaz rocks the whole ship as he slams on his guitar and turns it into a memorable evening…As the end of his performance approaches, he sings a ballad to boost the morales of the men on board, for the upcoming grinders…While the whole set of people is tied in the blazing strings of Ali Riyaz’s guitar, two men are secretly found on a miscout, at the back of the performance arena…The two men are Rafiq and Genie…Rafiq discusses about the terms on which they are sailing for this mission and the rest of the money matters…But there’s a man who goes to this area with an intention to vomit, but surprisingly finds these two men exchanging hard facts, and thus, secretly listens to each and every sensitive piece of knowledge exchanged there. And the person is Robot…And he doesn’t like keeping things to himself, so he returns back to the crew and says it all out loud…On hearing that they will collectively get just 15% of the grand income, all the people run to the two miscouters with their guns reloaded…Amna Ali places her Magnum, right onto Rafiq’s forehead and inquires of the biased money distribution to take place…Forced by the fear of so many guns on his head, Rafiq declares even distrbution of the money, when they go on implementing the algorithms in future…But from the inside, the ego and anguish in him, now makes him long for the whole 100% share, to come to his pocket…
While the next day, at just about an hour past dawn, the Kalians srtike the shores of Borneo…While all the Kalians are busy in taking guard, Robin disembarks the ship and wildly rushes onto the land with outstretched arms…A few metres from the ship, and he explodes himself to demise as he steps over an underground explosive mine…”Dammit! It was a booby track…! Bull shit! Another life lost…” is the cry from the captain…With loaded arms and heavy combat machinery, the Kalians land on the island of Borneo…And this time around, they keep the rebel, their former cabin girl with them on the hunt…Deadenstein helps them through the booby tracks and traps, with all his experience and bent…After walking for quite a time, slashDOT halts at a point and takes the map out, to study the region again…While everyone is busy in looking at the atlas, Oun sights a totally unusual and weird sort of a beast…At once he roars, “EVERYBODY GET DOWN! IT’S A BEAST”…In no time it flies past Tabish’s head and he just manages a narrow escape…Some call it a dragon, some call it kind of a hawk but the exact truth is known to no one…Oun quickly searches it on the National Geographic instant engines and finds it to be a very unusual creature which is never heard before…A beast that possesses vice-like jaws and a tail, like the one a crocodile has that can hold in it atleast a couple of human bodies with ease, and a tongue that can firmly wriggle around a human body in a similar fashion as an anaconda itself can. The skin is composed of hard scales almost like rocks. The researchers have named it as “Viperox Thong”, found in the very region, where the Kalians have got the business to do!
SlashDOT has a quick glance at the map and everybody starts to rush towards the point slashDOT tells…As soon as they reach there, they get to find out that a young Viperox Thong awaits their presence…As soon as the beast takes off, everyone lays into the trench down there…The gun men fire again and again at the beast, but the Viperox turns invincible…”What do we do? Even the rocket launcher has let us down…This thing is outrageous” cries Danyal in despair…It comes close to Beena and she throws a stone hard into it’s eye and the Viperox stumbles back a little…”Target it’s eyes” yells Beena with fear…Oun picks the machine gun and aims at it’s eyes…As soon as it pierces it’s eye, the beast roars with an ear splitting voice and throws its tongue towards Beena…Another fire, and the Viperox looks to become uncontrollable…It twister turns it’s tongue around Beena, firmly…Oun fires again and again, again and again, unless all the rounds from the magazine are gone…Oun closes his eyes and puts his head down in hopelessness, and just then he hears a huge noise and as he pulls his head up, he witnesses the beast lying on the ground, with a stream of blood flowing out of its eyes and Beena wrapped up, safe and alive…
[Continued in Episode 6: “The Escape…”... Coming soon! ]
THE HUNT FOR THE ALGOS…
Episode 4: “Down in the dumps…”
At once, slashDOT grabs Aqib’s phone and throws it into the sea, with no shilly-shallying whatsoever…”No one on this ship has the courage to let Aqib’s wife know about the most spiteful truth of her life, so there’s no use keeping this object of tension and tears amongst us…” says slashDOT. Out of the blue, the whole site becomes tense and stressed…Nobody prefers to talk much…Some turn to smoke, some to drink, some for prayers, some for the dinner and some keep standing at the deck, with their minds totally lost in the day’s happenings and the complexities faced so far…
Almost a week has past, since that deadly Kalsoft-Avanza ship assault…”We’ve left Rafiq way far behind. It’s time to kick back and relax…”says JB to the crew…”That’s what we are doing, moron! Just chilling, chilling and chilling!!” replies Hassan. The whole male squad turns promiscuous and shameless in the pleasure of drugs, except slashDOT and Fari…Both these unaffected men study the route and the coming complications thoroughly and come back to the rest of the men with these words:
“Attention guys! This is extremely important! There’s a fairly big rock coming ahead, that we’ll nearly reach in 20 hours time. We want you guys to get prepared. It’s gonna be sheer hard work and sweat flow…Once we pull our ship in the eastern direction from that rock, we’ll soon be nearing our destiny, the island of Borneo…” says slashDOT…But no one from them bothers to reply on what their captain just said because of being on drugs…”They are lost in the stupefaction and pleasure of intoxicants. They have lost their state of mind to sense how serious a matter this really is…” says Fari to slashDOT…At once, Fari snatches the lighter from Juni’s hand and runs to the food go-down…Trickles kerosene over the food stuff and sets it ablaze…SlashDOT comes running in…”What did you do? Are you mad, you rascal?” says the captain with a big foot right onto Fari’s chest…Fari pushes slashDOT back hard onto the floor and says,
”Shut up you useless captain! You don’t have the tiniest of hold among the crew…They don’t give a damn about what you say to them…Hassan can’t give up chatting to his girl friend, 24/7…Deaden can’t live without his Wolf Blass and Brunswick wines…Hamza, Akif and Danyal cant opt out of their opium sessions…The rest are not mere smokers either…Just wait and see, what the burning of food brings to them… Now they‘re gonna do it at every cost, because they can’t push themselves to deaths off hunger… You gotta realize that you and I alone, cannot get this ship moving down to the island of Borneo. It’s impossible, dear…Now they ‘re gonna get this ship moving for the sake of their lives…”
”Great thinking, you marvel” replies slashDOT with a grin.
Arifa rushes down to the addicted men and informs them about the food go-down that has been set to fire. Everyone arouses in revolt and turns to the burning site…The captain tells them about the happening and everyone stares at Fari for what he had done…”Come on guys! Let’s do it for our lives…the stomach that is attached to our frames, we just can’t survive keeping it vacant…Everyone, do it for his own stomach, for no one can reach Borneo, to feed himself, all alone, on his own…”These words of the skipper inject true zeal and enthusiasm among the voyagers…With approximately 19 hours of uphill struggle, the Kalians succeed in turning the ship to safety and at the edge of the rock, they get down to do some fishing…Oun catches them a bunch of fish and Tabish grills them to perfection…In this way, the Kalians with wide-awaken eyes and senses, get to fill their tummies, right before their final run to the destiny…
Soon Hassan and the rest of the members notice the absence of their cabin girl, Tasmiyah…Hassan and slashDOT secretly go to look for her on the ship…Hassan sneaks a glance through the key hole of the last room upstairs and finds Tasmiyah there, talking surreptitiously to someone on the cell…”Does she have a boy friend??”Hassan whispers in slashDOT’s ears…”How would I know! Whoever she may be talking to, it doesn’t suit us to secretly listen to what she says…So let’s leave…”replies the captain in a low soft voice…
While all the Kalians are busy in relaxing themselves at the rock, Tasmiyah calls slashDOT for some serious private talk…”So what’s up? Why did you call me up here on the ship? Is there something confidential to share?” inquires the captain…”Well…It is mighty confidential…” responds the cabin girl…
”I don’t wanna take long to tell the truth so I’m just saying it out loud…I was bribed by Rafiq to work as a spy for him and I’ve been transferring info about each and every development and happening on this ship to Rafiq, through my cell phone…I don’t know whether you’re gonna believe me or not but the truth is that…I’ve fallen in love with you and I’ve given up working for Rafiq. I hope you’ll trust me just as you would have counted on my tongue when I told you that I am a spy…I don’t care if you love me or not but that’s what I am…I told you the truth…Please forgive me for the wrongs I committed…”
“Is this all you wanted to say?” says slashDOT in a hard rough voice…
“Hmm” replies Tasmiyah.
“NOW TAKE THIS…”, with these words slashDOT slaps mega hard on Tasmiyah’s face and she falls to the ground with pain…With hick ups and tears, she moans herself to faint…”THIS IS ALL YOU DESERVE, YOU BLOODY BETRAYER…YOU REBEL…YOU TRAITOR…!” plus a few abusive words…slashDOT screams hard in anguish, facing the sky, with his hands covering his eyes…
[Continued in Episode 5: “The Final Run…”...Coming soon]
THE HUNT FOR THE ALGOS…
Episode 3:” The ships come nose to nose…”
A new day finally comes… The despair of the night is replaced by the energetic sun light that shatters the walls of grief for a new sun…The captain delivers a short speech at the deck:
“I urge you all to forget what happened last night. It surely was a big loss. We lost a mighty precious life. Let’s not just think of our own, we should better make ourselves ready to sacrifice for others. Remember, the margin for error is minimum here…Whatever happened last night, I affirm myself responsible for the happening…Had I not permitted Ali to go, never would he ever play such a dangerous dare…Let’s pray for his repose…May his soul rest in peace…”
Soon things get back to order. Shooting drills start in a short while, under the supervision of Deadenstein. Oun and Akif turn out to be the best shooters respectively.
The shooting drills then get over and after some time, Irtaza climbs up the chimney to examine the exhaust rate. A sharp sound of a bullet is heard…Everyone comes running out of the rooms and finds out Irtaza falling down from the chimney top, right onto the floor. His stomach has been pierced by a sniper round and he’s bleeding out…”DAMN! IT’S RAFIQ DOWN THERE…THEY ARE NEARING US…EVERYBODY GET DOWN…” cautions slashDOT, “GUYS, GET TO YOUR POSITIONS”…The captain further points out their respective jobs, “DEADEN AND DANYAL, ON THE FLAK 88’s…JUNI, ON THE MG42…OUN, ON THE MACHINE GUN…AQIB AND AKIF, ON THE SNIPERS…ROBIN AND HAMZA, ON THE SAILS…JB AND THE REST, ON THE FUEL MANAGEMENT…GET THIS SHIP MOVING ON THE FASTEST POSSIBLE PACE…WE WANNA LEAVE THEM BEHIND…I WANT MINIMUM LOSS OF LIVES FROM BOTH SIDES…EACH AND EVERY LIFE IS IMPORTANT…GO, GET ‘EM…!”
“Yes champ, covering fire” screams Deadenstein with a solid sense of responsibility.
Fari and slashDOT endeavor to give wounded Irtaza some treatment but it seems all in vain…”We missed out on a medic as well. We certainly should‘ve got one aboard…” utters Fari to slashDOT…
While on Avanza’s ship, Asim comments on Irtaza’s suffering, “We’ve left him for dead there. He’s of no use to them anymore!” while Genie, Green, Butt and Buntu, get their hands dirty on the “ticket-to-hell” awarding sniper rifles…Rafiq sways with a content grin on his face…
Another man on the Kalsoft ship is down, Aqib, who’s hit on the thigh by the Evil Genie…But this time around, it doesn’t turn out to be a source of demoralization, as the men in distress, the Kalians, are on the verge to lift themselves up for the sake of the glory…”Buntu’s down”, roars Oun with pride…”I want Rafiq and Genie dead. They are on top of my kill list…” with these words, Deadenstein turns to blood lost Aqib for help…
slashDOT and Fari, finally ice pick arms…”I want vengeance…I want Aqib and Irtaza’s blood back…Buntu ain’t enough…” says Fari to slashDOT…”Well, this is almost like Counter Strike…! This curt thunder bolt sound of the sniper rifle reminds me of the dust 2 round…” adds slashDOT to the conversation, ”And I’ve got one!…it’s Farhan!!”.”And I’ve got my man as well…it’s Battakh!!” replies Fari…”Great! We’ve got two important foes down!!That’s quite an achievement! I never wanted this loss of lives from both sides, but I just couldn’t resist the fall of Aqib, right after the victimization of Irtaza…just when we were trying to forget the sorrow of Ali Iftekhar’s loss” says the captain to the Kalians-in-distress…And then comes a sound from the sails section, as JB informs his mates, ”We are heading on with sheer pace…We have left them far behind…The distance is increasing…They won’t get a chance to mess with us again…”
Everyone gathers around the two seriously bleeding men…”Forgive me you all…And please don’t tell mum that I died of a gunshot…She won’t resist the pain…Better tell her that I ran away in Malaysia with some girl…But please don’t tell her about my death…For this will at least make her long and wait for my return, instead of the pain that ‘ll be inflicted right away on her when she’ll hear about my expiry…” stammers Irtaza in his dying moments…And then the Kalians turn to Aqib…”Pray for my entrance in the Heavens…I’m not worth going there…And please tell Rabia that doctor wives often don’t get a chance to save their dying hubbies!!…” are the finals words of Aqib on earth, as he breathes himself to demise with a smile…And just then, blinks the cell phone screen of Aqib and there comes a text message from her wife, Dr. Rabia:
“Well…If I die then what will your reaction be?? Isn’t this a bad question to ask…? Why are you asking this non sense any way??? But still, when you‘ve asked me, so it’s my obligation to say anything so…ummmm…If you really die then I’ ll…kill myself as well, otherwise my love might not forgive me…but anyway, let’s finish this Filmy dialogue vista…So you happy with my answer?? I’ am not kiddin’. I really mean my answer. Tell me… ”
[Continued in Episode 4:”Down in the dumps..."...Coming soon!]






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